


At the End of Infinity

by angelsandbrowncoats



Series: Nygmobblepot Week 2019 [2]
Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dreams, F/M, Fate & Destiny, Feelings Realization, Getting Together, Groundhog Day meets It's a Wonderful Life?, Hurt/Comfort, I wrote this in like 2 sittings, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Sex, Love Confessions, M/M, Minor Character Death, and I don't have the time to reread it, but much less than in some of my other fics, i tagged a lot for original characters but there's only a few, so I hope it makes sense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-25
Updated: 2019-03-25
Packaged: 2019-12-07 18:10:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18238448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelsandbrowncoats/pseuds/angelsandbrowncoats
Summary: When Edward saves a mysterious being with equally mysterious wish-granting powers, he requests the ability to return to different points in his own past, as many times as he wants, in search of his one true happy ending. What Edward doesn't realize is that his happy ending isn't quite as straightforward as changing one decision from his past.Day 2: Fate/Destiny





	At the End of Infinity

**Author's Note:**

> As I mention in the tags, I haven't had the time to actual do a read-through of this, so I sure hope it's coherent. If not, we're blaming my cold. 
> 
> This is definitely far angstier than yesterday's fic, but I promise if you stick through to the end, it will get better.

“You have helped me greatly, so I will grant you whatever you wish,” the voice boomed out over the chasm in the ground where Edward lay, covered in a thick layer of ash.

 

He groaned, every part of his body searing with pain from his fall. Anything he wished.

 

“I wish,” he panted, “To be able to go back and change my past. To return to whatever spot I wish, whenever I request, until I get an ending that pleases me.”

 

“Granted. You need only say ‘Take me back to the beginning of time’ if you wish to restart. When would you like to go?”

 

~          ~          ~

 

“I’m sorry, Oswald,” Edward said, “I didn’t mean to stand you up. The truth is, I know. I know what you were going to tell me. I know how you feel about me. But… I don’t feel the same. I’m sorry. I love someone else.”

 

“Ed – ,” Oswald began. Edward shook his head, “No. I’ll hand in my resignation tomorrow. We’re leaving Gotham. Please don’t follow me.”

 

“Ed, no, I can put my feelings aside. You don’t have to leave! Please…”

 

“I know, Oswald, but… it’s for the best. It’s what I need to do to be happy.”

 

Oswald had tears in his eyes, and Edward told himself he felt satisfied about that.

 

“If that is the truth,” Oswald sighed, “Then go. Be happy.”

 

Edward blinked. He hadn’t expected Oswald to be so, well, understanding. He nodded, turning to leave.

 

“If you ever need – or want – anything, know that I will be here.”

 

“Thank you,” he forced the words out, unable to look at the man who didn’t know they were enemies.

 

~          ~          ~

 

“Eddie, darling,” Isabella called from the doorway. Edward rushed from the kitchen to greet her with a kiss, “Isabella! My love. How was work?”

 

“Wonderful, as always, dear,” she grinned, painted nails tapping lightly against his cheek, “I was thinking we should go out tomorrow night. Perhaps a cruise?”

 

“But,” Edward’s face fell, “Tomorrow night is trivia night.”

 

Isabella pouted, “I feel like you care more about your silly trivia team than about me. It’s always “trivia this” and “trivia that” with you. And I don’t trust that team you play with. That Sandra woman always smiles too widely at you.”

 

“Sandra?” Edward frowned, “You don’t have to feel threatened by the likes of her. She’s nothing compared to you.”

 

“Oh, honey, I’m not worried about what _you_ would do. I know you’re dedicated to me. I’m just worried about what _she_ might try.”

 

“I’m sure it’s – ”

 

“No, I don’t think you should continue to hang out with her. Or any of them, for that matter. Let’s make Wednesday night our date night.”

 

“Isn’t Saturday also date night?”

 

“Well, Saturday can be dates in, and Wednesday can be dates out? How does that sound? Or do you not like spending time with me anymore?”

 

“Of course that’s not true, Isabella!”

 

“Then I don’t see the problem,” she kissed him again, “I’m going to go get dressed. We can talk more about this over dinner.”

 

As soon as she was gone, Edward collapsed into the rocking chair. Trivia aside, he hadn’t left the house alone in months. Everywhere he went, Isabella went, too. Slowly, he’d somehow lost touch with all his hobbies and interests. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d done something he truly enjoyed, just because he wanted to. This couldn’t go on.

 

_Isabella doesn’t understand some sides of me_ , he realized. He didn’t want to leave her. She was the love of his life. But he needed other friends in his life too – or, at least, _one_ other.

 

“Take me back to the beginning of time,” Edward whispered, and suddenly he was floating in a void.

 

“Things didn’t work out quite as expected, I take it,” the voice sounded unsurprised.

 

“Take me back to the same point as last.”

 

“Going to do things differently?”

 

“I’m going to get things right this time.”

 

~          ~          ~

 

“Oswald!”

 

“Ed! You’re alive! I was so worried,” Oswald was hugging him, and Edward realized how long it had been since he’d touched someone besides Isabella.

 

“What happened?”

 

“I’m so sorry, Oswald,” Edward said, “I lost track of time last night. I shouldn’t have stood you up.”

 

“As long as you’re okay,” Oswald said, “But there is something else I wanted to tell you. Something I meant to tell you over dinner.”

 

Edward knew what Oswald was going to say, but in that moment, he realized he’d never heard him say it. At least, no Oswald who hadn’t been betrayed by him first.

 

“Ed, you are my best friend, and I know I shouldn’t ask more from you, but… I can’t help the way I feel. I love you.”

 

The words affected him more than he expected they would, but he held it together enough to say the words he’d planned, “I – it’s important that you know, Oswald, that you are my best friend as well. But I’m afraid I don’t feel the same. I love another. I don’t want to lose you as a friend, so I beg you to respect my feelings on the matter, and I will try to be mindful of yours.”

 

Oswald’s face fell, a hope crushed, but at least he didn’t look angry. He just seemed… sad.

 

“I understand, Ed,” Oswald nodded, “I don’t wish to lose you as a friend either. And if you would – please don’t bring her here, at least not yet. Perhaps someday, I will be ready to meet this lucky woman, but until then… it would only end poorly for all of us.”

 

Edward nodded in turn, “I can do that, Oswald. I – I want you to know that I _do_ care about you. I just can’t care in the same way that you do.”

 

“Thank you for your honesty, Ed,” Oswald said, no longer meeting his eyes, and Edward wondered why those words made him feel so rotten inside. It was probably being thanked by his sworn enemy…

 

But no, that was behind them. Or in front of them? Maybe at a diagonal angle. Time travel made things weird. What mattered now was that Ed had the love of his life at his side and his friend back and everything was going to be okay.

 

~          ~          ~

 

Edward fell to his knees, sobbing, _screaming_. He couldn’t do anything. He was as helpless, as _hopeless_ as the child he had once been, unable to do what needed to be done.

 

“Fuck,” a voice behind him growled, “Gun’s jammed.”

 

“Get out of here!”

 

“Dumb bitch just had to ruin my one good shot, huh?”

 

“Run, before he gathers his wits!”

 

There was a commotion, and Edward finally looked up. Two leather-clad women were running away from the scene. Tabitha, he thought bitterly, and probably her new sidekick, Selina.

 

There would be time to hunt them later. For now, he had to stay with Isabella, try to rush her to the hospital, even as Edward knew she wouldn’t make it. She clasped his hand, pulling him close.

 

“How glorious it is to die for love,” she whispered, “Just how I always wished. Join me soon, my love.”

 

And then she went still.

 

He was still sobbing when he rang Oswald, choking out what had happened into the phone. He didn’t know how long he’d knelt on the floor beside her body by the time he arrived.

 

“Did you do this?” Edward couldn’t help but ask. Oswald gaped at him, “Ed, I would never!”

 

“You thought about it, didn’t you?”

 

“I – perhaps. Perhaps I considered it. But I would never actually follow through, not when I knew she was your true love. You said it was Tabitha?”

 

Edward nodded, “I know it wasn’t you,” he hadn’t been able to help the accusation, but he regretted it now, “She was aiming at me. Revenge on you, I’m sure. Isabella jumped in front of me.”

 

“I’m so sorry.”

 

“Take me back to the beginning of time,” Edward sighed. He just barely heard Oswald’s confused, “What?” before he was sucked back into the void.

 

~          ~          ~

 

“Am I just destined for pain and misery? Is that what’s going on?” Edward asked.

 

“Perhaps you’ve been going about this all wrong,” the voice suggested.

 

“No, no I…” Edward trailed off in thought.

 

“Perhaps it isn’t about Isabella.”

 

“What do you…?” Edward gasped, “Oh! Of _course_. Of course it’s not about Isabella. It’s about Kristen!”

 

The voice was silent.

 

“Please reset time to the moment before I decided to tell Kristen I killed Dougherty.”

 

“If that is what you will, then I shall,” the voice droned, and the world around Edward melted away to be replaced with his old apartment.

 

“Kristen,” he breathed. She gave him a funny look, “Yeah?”

 

“Sorry,” he apologized, “I’m just _so_ glad you’re here.”

 

She smiled then, the sweetest smile he’d ever seen, and said, “So am I.”

 

They fell into a rhythm after that. Edward destroyed all evidence of Officer Dougherty’s murder and set about recreating his persona of the Riddler. Being still employed at the GCPD made it all the easier, but the risk so much more thrilling.

 

The only downside was hiding his secret life from Kristen. He hated lying to her, especially knowing the sort of men she was used to dating. He hated the weary look in her eyes when she noticed him slipping back into bed in the middle of the night.

 

“Where were you?” she would mumble. He would shush her and say, “I had to get some air. Bad dream.”

 

He was fairly certain she didn’t quite believe him.

 

The other downside was Penguin.

 

And _Penguin_ he was, he had made sure of that, after Edward had made the mistake of calling him Oswald at their first confrontation. Apparently trying to rob the same bank as another, more well-established criminal is considered bad manners. Edward had had to hide a lot of bruises from Kristen after that particular event.

 

But making enemies out of his never-befriended best friend could be born if only for the fact that it wasn’t the only thing this reality had born; Edward had married Kristen two years after returning to this timeline, and since then, they’d had three beautiful children. Edward often worried about his skills as a father, having no good example to go on. But Kristen assured him he was doing fine, and he loved their kids with all his heart. Sarah, the eldest, named in the memory of their old captain, had her father’s brains and her mother’s sharp tongue. Edward harbored secret dreams of handing the Riddler mantle down to her when he was old enough to retire. The other two, twin boys – Alexander and Nicholas, were troublesome, for sure, but they had good hearts.

 

For all his struggles and regrets, this version of the future was worth it for them.

 

And then Oswald, _damn him – he’d hated Riddler ever since he’d had the audacity to call him Oswald_ , decided the best way to get leverage over the Riddler was to find out who he was and kidnap his family.

 

“Perhaps,” Oswald had said, “This will make you more open to my suggestions.”

 

And then he had opened the door and ushered Edward into a room where Kristen and Sarah and Alexander and Nicholas were all of them tied to chairs. Kristen’s eyes were terrified, but she was being so strong for their children.

 

“It’s Riddler!” Sarah cried out excitedly, and Edward wanted to cry from the cocktail of emotions he was experiencing. He’d always secretly encouraged Sarah’s enthusiasm towards the Riddler, being over the moon in planning her Riddler-themed 7th birthday.

 

“Shh, sweetheart,” Kristen whispered, before addressing him, “I don’t know what you want with us, but we have nothing to give you. Let us go. At least let the children go.”

 

“She has a point,” he said in his gravelly Riddler voice, “I don’t care to be associated with people who would stoop so low as to harm children.”

 

“Don’t worry,” Oswald waved a hand, “I don’t harm children, either, whatever the rumors may say.”

 

“Then why are they here, Penguin?”

 

“Ah! I was just getting to that,” Oswald rubbed his hands together, giving Edward a conspiratorial wink, “Either you hand over your recent loot – the paintings you pilfered last week – and swear to work for me, or my men here,” he gestured with his gun towards the hall where Victor Zsasz blew Edward a kiss, “will tie you to that vacant chair over there, take your mask, and leave. You’ll get out eventually, I’m sure.”

 

So Oswald knew who he was. He suspected as much when his wife and children had been captured, but he hadn’t expected the threat of being unmasked to them. It also put pressure on him, to ask in front of them. If he hesitated too long, they would get suspicious.

 

But he wouldn’t bow to Oswald’s demands. He knew he wouldn’t be able to stomach working so closely with the man he still thought of as a friend, knowing he would only ever be _the Riddler_ to him. Oh, how things had changed, he thought bitterly.

 

“I guess I’ll take the risk,” Edward said, laying his weapon down and holding up his hands, “It’s high time anyways.”

 

Oswald raised his eyebrows, taken aback. And to be fair, it was a dumb move. The only reason he was making it was the unique position he was in, having a friend who didn’t know they were friends.

 

Zsasz entered the room, tying him up in the chair across from his family. Edward tensed, eyes closing as he braced himself. He felt purple silk slip away from his face, heard the gasp of his wife, the squeal of his daughter.

 

Finally, he pried his eyes open.

 

It was so much worse than he’d expected. Kristen was staring at him in betrayal and disgust. The boys looked scared. At least Sarah was happy, he thought through the tears.

 

“ _YOU?_ How could you, Ed? How many people have you killed?”

 

“Yes,” he nodded, “Me. I didn’t want to hurt you with the knowledge. I knew you couldn’t accept that part of me, so I hid it. And for the record, only eighteen.”

 

“ _ONLY EIGHTEEN?_ ” Kristen shrieked, “Oh god, I’ve been sleeping with a murderer. When – when did it start? The Riddler’s been around almost as long as we’ve been dating. Who was the first?”

 

In for a penny, in for a pound, he told himself, meeting her eyes as he said, “Dougherty.”

 

She gasped, “You – you killed – ? You killed Dougherty? Freak!”

 

“Mom,” Sarah said, “Mom, it’s still Dad.”

 

“I don’t know who you are,” Kristen said.

 

“It’s me, Kristen. It’s Edward.”

 

She shook her head while the younger boys started to cry at all the shouting, not quite understanding what was going on.

 

Edward freed himself from the chair, ignoring the pain in his heart as Kristen flinched at his approach. He raised his hands, “I’m going to untie you all, now.”

 

He began with Sarah, high-fiving her when he realized she had already half wiggled free, “I taught you well.”

 

“You’ve been teaching our daughter to be a criminal?” Kristen gasped, “What, have you taken her out killing, yet, or were you waiting for her sweet sixteen?”

 

“I would never ask another person to kill, least of all Sarah,” Edward said, freeing the boys and hugging them both, while Sarah said, “I think it would be fun.”

 

“Sarah Marie Nygma!” Kristen admonished, then paused, “Sarah Marie Kringle, I suppose.”

 

Edward paused in untying her, tears falling freely from his eyes, “Please, you don’t mean that.”

 

“I do,” Kristen’s voice wavered, a mockery of the vows they had once made to each other, “How do I know you wouldn’t hurt us, someday?”

 

“I would nev – I,” he trailed off, remembering how things had ended the first time.

 

“See, you can’t even promise that.”

 

“No, Kristen, please!”

 

“And even if you could, when will the next criminal come along, looking to use us as leverage?” she asked, “They won’t all be as moral as Penguin apparently is. I won’t have my children growing up like that.”

 

“Our children,” Edward said weakly.

 

She stood up as he finished untying her, moving away from him as his hands fell uselessly to his sides. She grabbed the boys and took Sarah’s hand, “We’re leaving Gotham. I’ll mail you the divorce papers from a stop along the way. I don’t ever want to see you anywhere near me or my children ever again.”

 

“Kristen! You can’t do this.”

 

“Can’t I? No court will give custody to the likes of you. You’re a mass murderer, _Riddler_. Not a father.”

 

“Dad!” Sarah cried out, opposing her mother’s words.

 

“Sarah,” he reached out without moving, “Sarah, I believe in you. You’re the most amazing girl in the world. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. I love you. And you, Nicholas. And you, Alexander. Don’t,” he broke off in a sob, “Don’t give your mother any trouble.”

 

Kristen glanced back at him at that, a pained look on her face, before she shut off and turned away. Apparently, his betrayal would always be the straw that broke her.

 

When his children had vanished, he sank to his knees. This life had always been wrong for him. It had always been too good to be true, too perfect.

 

“Take me back to the beginning of time,” he cried.

 

~          ~          ~

 

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” he sobbed at the void. The voice sounded more exasperated than last time, “You’re still not getting it.”

 

“Not getting what?”

 

“You want a happy ending? You need to get it with someone who understand and accepts you. _All of you_.”

 

“No one’s ever… no.”

 

“He did. He did and he does and he always will, if you give him the chance,” the voice sighed.

 

“It’s not like that,” Edward protested.

 

“Isn’t it?”

 

“Fine, you’re so certain? Let’s try it your way. You’ll see soon enough.”

 

“We shall see…”

 

~          ~          ~

 

“Ed!”

 

“Hi, Oswald,” he breathed out, a hesitant grin on his face as he smoothed down his suit with one hand, holding out the wine with the other, “I’m not late, am I?”

 

“Only about ten minutes,” Oswald waved a hand, “I was worried, but now I see it was all for naught – you’re safe and you’re here!”

 

“Yeah,” he nodded, not quite believing he was actually going to have that infamous dinner, “Yeah, I am…”

 

The night passed pleasantly, Edward finding himself a little sad he hadn’t had the joy of partaking in Oswald’s veritable feast before then. He truly had outdone himself. The only thing that was lacking was the conversation. Edward tried to keep things going with talk about work, both legal and illegal, but Oswald’s nerves prevented any dialogue from going far. Finally, Edward had had enough.

 

“Oswald, you said there was something you wanted to tell me, and you seem nervous…?”

 

“Ah, yes,” Oswald dabbed at his mouth with his napkin, returning it to his lap and staring down at his now clasped hands, “There is something I wanted to say to you. I – I am nervous. I don’t want, I _never_ want to be a source of pain or discomfort to you. So however you may feel about what I am about to say, know that I will accept what you have to say, and I am willing to do what needs to be done to keep your friendship.”

 

“Oswald?” he asked, even though he knew what was coming.

 

“Ed, I – I – I think,” he paused, taking a deep breath and looking up, right into Edward’s eyes. Edward felt ensnared in that earnest gaze.

 

“Ed, I love you.”

 

Edward felt himself gasp, in that full-bodied way of his. The reaction was half natural, half for show. As he laid a hand over his heart, it registered that those words affected him more than they should have. He was just doing this to prove a point, yes, but still… it felt so _nice_ to hear them from the man he had pined after so long ago, back when Oswald had been just a rising criminal and Ed a simple forensic. The memories of those feelings were bubbling under the surface, and Edward wanted nothing more than to push them back.

 

Instead, he did what he had set out to do. He opened one of the tiny cracks in his armor, his mask, and let a little of those old feelings push through. As long as he kept it small, he’d be able to control it. Use it to play into this charade.

 

“Oh, Oswald,” he sighed, “You don’t know how long I’ve waited to hear you say that.”

 

And in a way, it was true.

 

~          ~          ~

 

Edward wanted to say he was miserable, but he wasn’t sure if that qualified as a lie.

 

In truth, Edward had never been happier. But that happiness made him _furious_. He was _trying_ to prove a point to that mysterious voice; he was _trying_ to prove that Oswald or no Oswald, he was destined to be miserable.

 

Instead, he was having the time of his life, much to his dismay.

 

Here he was, decked from head to toe in a garish green costume, spray painting a riddle onto the wall of a museum. Oswald was currently inside that museum, having planned the heist with him, raiding it of all the artifacts they most coveted. Oswald had been surprisingly indulgent in Edward’s wish to become a masked criminal, only objecting to his costume – yet paying for it anyways.

 

During the day, Edward still organized much of Oswald’s business as both mayor and kingpin. Nights were another matter, typically ending in one of four ways: a quiet evening in, an outing to some lovely restaurant or expensive symphony, a heist, or – Edward blushed – sex. It wasn’t something he had considered when he decided to prove his point, but he certainly didn’t regret it, either. Both Kristen and Isabella had expected so much from him on that front, and he had always been terrified of letting them down. They wanted someone strong and confident and in control, all things Edward had only ever wished to be. And he tried, he really did, but whatever weak reassurances they offered him afterwards, he always knew he had missed the mark.

 

With Oswald, though… with Oswald, Edward didn’t have to try to be anything or anyone. He simply got to be. Oswald didn’t care which of Edward’s traits were more prominent on any given night. He didn’t expect Edward to be anyone other than himself, and he certainly didn’t expect Edward to control the situation. For all Oswald’s inexperience and chivalry in matters of the heart, he never once lost his poise, and if Edward were being honest with himself, that was the biggest turn on of them all. Even when Oswald infuriated him by insisting on asking if he was okay every five minutes, nervous about hurting him, a part of him loved it. He ignored the thought that maybe no one had ever cared enough about him to show that kind of restraint.

 

But just because he was comfortable around Oswald in ways he’d never been with anyone, just because that comfort had allowed him to gain a deeper understanding of his sexuality with Oswald, just because he was happier than he had ever been… that didn’t mean he _loved_ Oswald. He had sworn such a thing off years ago, when he had first realized that Oswald had betrayed him. For that to be wrong would mean…

 

Well, it would mean that he had been wasting his life. That he had spent years denying himself the one thing that could have made him happier. That he had been miserable over a simple _folly_. It couldn’t be true.

 

“All set, my love?”

 

He turned to see Oswald smiling at him, eyes fond – or more, holding a bag of presumably their treasure. Oswald’s smile wavered as he registered the deep frown on Edward’s face and how the spray paint was hanging at Edward’s side.

 

“Darling? Is everything okay?”

 

Edward bit his lip, eyes shining with tears that had started welling up. He shook his head.

 

“What’s wrong?” Oswald was at his side within moments, wrapping an arm around him, frantically checking him over for injuries.

 

Edward shook his head, “It’s – you wouldn’t understand, but I guess… I guess I just never thought I could truly be happy. Especially with you. It was a dream from long past that I had given up on ages ago… I still don’t quite believe we could find our happy ending. Won’t something stop us?”

 

Oswald pulled him close, and Edward hated how comforting that felt.

 

“No one can stop us but ourselves, love. Don’t keep your insecurities bottled up like that. I’ll always accept you, I’ll always _love_ you, no matter what you’ve done, no matter who you are… But I can’t be there for you if you don’t let me.”

 

Edward burst into tears at that. It was everything he’d ever wanted to hear, from the man he’d once wanted to hear it from, and he couldn’t handle it.

 

“Take me back to the beginning of time,” he said shakily.

 

“What was that, love?”

 

And then there was nothing.

 

“Oh, good grief,” the voice told him, “Maybe you’re right. Maybe you are destined to be miserable.”

 

“No,” Edward shook his head, “I’ve finally realized why I’ve been stuck in this miserable rut. It’s just the shade of a desire I never truly purged myself of, getting in my way of moving forward.”

 

“What.”

 

“I know where I need to go.”

 

“I’m not sure you do.”

 

“You promised!” Edward protested. He heard a long-suffering sigh, “Yes, I suppose I did. Alright. But I want it on the record that I think you’re making bad decisions.”

 

“No one asked,” Edward huffed, arms crossed, before he gave the time and location he wished to be returned to and the void fell away.

 

~          ~          ~

 

“Any last words?” he asked, still following the script. He needed to wait until the last moment to get away with it, or Oswald would be able to adapt his plans. He always was better at strategy, Edward thought bitterly.

 

“I’m fine for now,” Oswald said, infuriatingly calm even to this Edward, who knew what was coming.

 

“I’m going to _shoot you_ , Oswald. There is no later. If you have something to say… _now_ is the time.”

 

“I’ll wait,” Oswald told him.

 

“Fine,” he said, “You might have nothing to say, but I do. You hurt me, Oswald. More than – almost – anyone. You promised me so much, you did so much – _I_ promised you so much, and then you threw that all away in a fit of jealousy. If you had just asked me to leave her for you, I would have. I know that now. I missed you so much when you were gone. I’ve been so tied to you for so long. I’ve tried to rid myself of you after remaking myself in your image. There were so many unsaid things between us, but whether you remember or not, I’ve said them now. It’s finally time for me to move on. I’m sorry things couldn’t have ended better between us. But everything keeps leading back to you like some kind of loop, and I’m done being stuck.”

 

“What if everything keeps leading back to me for another reason?”

 

Edward shook his head. He wouldn’t let Oswald’s words put him off his course. Not now. Not when what he wanted – no, not what he wanted, but what he needed – was so close.

 

He raised the gun that he had refilled with the bullets he’d hidden ahead of time, hand shaking nearly as much as it had the first time, finger for once not resting on the trigger.

 

“Goodbye, Oswald,” he said, biting his lip at the confident face of a man who had no idea he was about to die despite the gun pointed at his chest.

 

He lifted his finger, placed it on the trigger.

 

All he had to do was squeeze.

 

Oswald raised an imperious eyebrow, “Having second thoughts?”

 

Edward tried again. All he needed was a light pressure from his index finger and the loop would finally be broken. Freedom was within his grasp. He just needed to –

 

He shook his head, “I can’t.”

 

“What?” Oswald blinked.

 

He removed the replacement bullets, ignoring the way Oswald’s eyes widened, the way he was saying, “How did you know…?”

 

“Take me back to the beginning of time.”

 

~          ~          ~

 

“Well that was fairly brief,” the voice said, “I told you you didn’t know what you were doing.”

 

“Shut up,” Edward glared at the nothingness around him.

 

“Well, what now?”

 

“I… what Oswald said. What if everything keeps leading us back together for a different reason?”

 

“What about it?”

 

“What if that reason… what I said to him, all those years ago… what if it’s fate?”

 

The void was suspiciously silent.

 

“What if Oswald and I are destined to be together, whether as friends, lovers, or enemies? We’re made to match.”

 

“Well, what would you do, then?” the voice asked, and Edward got the distinct feeling it thought he was on the right track.

 

“I don’t know.”

 

“What if I let you in on a secret,” the voice said, “The universe. _Fate_. It can only do so much. You still have the ability to make your own decisions. Fate can only nudge you in the right direction.”

 

“So you’re saying we’re destined to be together, but we get to decide how that ends up?”

 

“Your choices are your own, Edward Nygma, as are the consequences of your choices yours to bear.”

 

Edward thought about that for a moment before the answer became clear, “I know where I need to go. For real this time.”

 

~          ~          ~

 

“Oswald!” a recognizable voice burst through Oswald’s reverie.

 

“I must not be paying my security enough,” Oswald muttered, not looking up from his desk, “What is it, Ed?”

 

“Oswald, I know we’re in the middle of what is more or less the apocalypse, but I’ve had a revelation.”

 

“And it just can’t wait?” Oswald asked drily.

 

“No! Oswald, I can’t be bought, but I can be stolen with one glance. I’m worthless to one, but priceless to two,” he breathed.

 

Oswald’s hand clenched around his pen. He didn’t need this right now.

 

“If you have a point, make it,” he ground out.

 

“Oswald, you and I – we’re destined to be together! At the end of infinity, there will always be you and me. It took me so long to see, but I’d rather that be as lovers than as enemies. Please. I want to give us a shot?”

 

That made Oswald look up. Edward looked so hopeful, so _desperately_ hopeful.

 

But he could be a decent actor when he wasn’t emotionally invested, and Oswald wasn’t about to get hurt like that again, so he just said, “No, Ed. I don’t know what you’re trying to accomplish, but no. That ship sailed a long, _long_ time ago.”

 

He didn’t enjoy watching Edward deflate, the crushed look in his eyes, but he reminded himself that there was no chance this could be anything other than a ploy designed to play with his heart. He and Edward would never have their happy ending. It wasn’t worth it, trying to open his heart ever again. If he remembered that, he could bear the way Edward stuttered out an apology, face flaming and eyes shining, excusing himself from Oswald’s presence.

 

That night, Oswald drank himself to sleep. When he awoke, he wasn’t in his bed.

 

Or rather, he wasn’t in the bed he’d fallen asleep in.

 

He was back in his old room again. Had all those long years as Penguin been a dream? Was Edward nothing but an exaggeration of his imagination?

 

He heard humming from the kitchen, and he burst out of the room. There she was.

 

“Mother?” he breathed. Gertrud turned to him, a warm smile on her face, “Oh, my darling boy! You are finally up! We were beginning to worry.”

 

“We?” he wondered as he hugged her tight.

 

“Of course,” another voice, familiar, came from the doorway. He turned, jaw dropping, “Father?”

 

“Are you surprised?” Elijah asked, stepping forward to make it a family hug, “Although, I suppose I _do_ usually sleep later than you.”

 

“No,” he wiped a tear from his eyes, “It’s just… I love you both so much. You have no idea.”

 

“Oh, dear boy, I think we do,” Elijah chuckled, “But no more tears! It’s such a beautiful day, and soon we will be enjoying that delicious meal your mother is making.”

 

He leaned over to kiss Gertrud before asking, “Do you need any help, my love?”

 

“No, no,” she told him, “Go. Sit. It will be ready soon.”

 

She turned back to the stove, singing an old Hungarian folk song, and Oswald was overcome at how perfect the scene before him seemed, even though he couldn’t remember his father ever being in their apartment.

 

He turned to look at his father, who was reading the paper at the table. They ate together, and Oswald wanted the moment to last forever. But soon, his father was standing, heading somewhere else, and Gertrud was at the sink washing dishes while Oswald dried them. He glanced over at her, doing a double take as he realized there were tear tracks on her face.

 

“Mother? Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

 

“Oh, nothing,” she said quietly, wiping the tears away with her sleeve, “It’s just… sometimes I wish your father were here. That I could dance with him again,” she looked over at him, “That he could see what a wonderful boy his son is.”

 

“But he is here?” Oswald frowned. Gertrud gave him a watery smile, laying a hand on his cheek, “Only in spirit.”

 

Confused, Oswald set the cloth down on the counter, heading into the living room. Elijah was sitting in a big armchair there.

 

“Father?” he asked, “Why does Mother think you’re gone?”

 

Elijah didn’t answer, closing the book in his hand and setting it aside. He gestured Oswald to come closer, clasping Oswald’s hands in his.

 

“You still have time. Do not repeat my mistake. If there is one thing I would have you learn from me, it is that you do not turn from true love when you have it. I lost my chance at love and regretted it every day ‘til my passing. Do not live or die as I have. Not when you can still choose love.”

 

“Father?” he asked, but Elijah just faded into nothingness. He turned back towards the kitchen, but before he could reach his mother, he opened his eyes.

 

Oswald sagged against the bed in the fortress he had built for himself. The apocalypse of Gotham left much to be desired, but at least he still had a comfortable place to sleep.

 

The dream he’d just had was sharp in his mind, and he couldn’t help but think it was a sign from his parents. He thought back over the previous day, and for all his misgivings, he couldn’t disobey his parents wishes. He needed to find Edward.

 

~          ~          ~

 

It isn’t difficult to track Edward back to the library he’d made his home, but when Oswald reached it, he wasn’t sure what to do. Did he need to be armed? Did he just let himself in?

 

In the end, he kept his weapon close to his side, sneaking in from the back.

 

There was Edward, aggressively reorganizing the books, muttering to himself. He didn’t seem to notice Oswald, so he decided to take the chance to listen.

 

“…maybe I am just doomed to misery,” Edward was saying, “I don’t know. Should I restart? I thought I knew… I have to progress from the main time, I’ll think it’s fake otherwise, won’t I? I can’t restart, but… Yes, I know I have to make my own decisions. A romantic gesture? Would that work? No, no that’s kidnapping, that definitely wouldn’t work. I know. I miss them so much. But were they even real? We’re here now. _I’m_ here now. I’ve got to decide what to do…”

 

Oswald cleared his throat, having heard enough to know he wouldn’t be gleaning any information from Edward’s frantic nonsense.

 

Edward whipped around, dropping the book he was holding when he spied Oswald.

 

“Os – Oswald?” he tried to turn and straighten at the same time, managing mostly to stumble before finally righting himself, “What – what are you doing here?”

 

He looked so defensive, like he couldn’t decide whether to try and use his height to intimidate or to try and make himself smaller and less of a target.

 

“I was… overly hasty in my decision yesterday,” Oswald said, “I was afraid that letting you into my life would only ever cause pain. I was… _reminded_ that sometimes you have to take risks to get rewards. Fortune favors the bold, and all that.”

 

“What do you mean?” Edward asked cautiously.

 

“I mean that, if you are being genuine, I would like very much to try again. I still love you, Ed.”

 

Edward practically melted at his words, hurrying to Oswald’s side and kissing him like he was a drowning man and Oswald was oxygen. A little ironic, in Oswald’s mind, considering how much more difficult kissing made breathing. Not that he was complaining.

 

~          ~          ~

 

Edward couldn’t quite believe it when he woke up in an unfamiliar bed, and _not_ because he knew the chip had been removed from his head. Mostly because the bed in question belonged to Oswald Cobblepot, and he was finally in the right timeline. He rolled over, closer to Oswald, burrowing into his side. Everything felt right at last. Truly right. He wasn’t even resentful of the content feeling settled in his stomach anymore.

 

“Mmm,” Oswald shifted as he woke up, “Ed?”

 

Edward fell to the side as Oswald shot up.

 

“Ugh, yes, lay _down_ ,” he mumbled, tugging on Oswald’s arm. Oswald was staring at him like he couldn’t quite believe he was there.

 

“What are you doing here?”

  
Edward blinked up at him, unable to see properly without his glasses, “Did you expect me to sneak out in the night? When I said I wanted to give us a chance, I didn’t mean as a one night stand.”

 

The events of the past few days seemed to come back to Oswald, who glanced down at his underwear and asked, “Did we…?”

 

Edward shook his head, “You said you wanted to wait for the ‘right time’. I bargained until you let me sleep here, at least.”

 

Oswald nodded, “I stand by that, Ed. You’re worth it, waiting to make sure it’s special.”

 

Edward wasn’t sure if he liked the sound of that enough to be placated for being denied. As long as he could sleep beside him, he supposed…

 

“But speaking of night stands,” Oswald frowned, “What’s that on yours?”

 

Reaching out to find his glasses and jam them on his face, Edward rolled over and sat up, peering down at bright blue paper that definitely hadn’t been on the night table before.

 

_153 Cherryblossom Avenue, Room 2B19_

“It’s an address,” Edward frowned.

 

“153 Cherryblossom Avenue,” Oswald read over his shoulder, “Isn’t that…?”

 

“The back entrance of the hospital in the green zone,” Edward nodded, “Second floor, wing B.”

 

“Who could have gotten in here? What does it mean?” Oswald asked. Edward shrugged, “Only one way to find out.”

 

~          ~          ~

 

“Penguin? Nygma? What are you doing here?”

 

“We’re not here to cause trouble, don’t worry,” Oswald rolled his eyes at Lee, “Someone broke into my private quarters last night and left this.”

 

Lee snatched the piece of paper, glancing over it, then frowning.

 

“What is it?” Edward asked.

 

“I – I’m not sure. I think we’d better head up there.”

 

“You can just direct us – ,” Edward began.

 

“Absolutely not,” Lee shook her head, “I’m accompanying you and making sure you don’t cause any harm.”

 

“You wound us,” Oswald said flatly.

 

“You’ll survive.”

 

Lee finished up with what she was working on, washed her hands, then returned to them.

 

“Right this way, gentleman,” she gestured, and they couldn’t quite tell if she was being sarcastic. But Edward didn’t have time to think it over, because as they walked down the corridor, one of the nurses paused as they passed, eyes flashing gold. He stopped to stare, and she said, “They have no memory of their parents, but they are otherwise unchanged. It was the best I could do.”

 

“I’m sorry?” Edward inquired, but the nurse only looked at him in confused recognition, “Riddler? What are you…?”

 

“Ed, this way,” Lee called back to him, so he shook his head and caught up.

 

“Here we are,” she finally said, stopping, “2B19. I don’t know why someone would have directed the two of you here, though.”

 

“Why not?” Oswald asked.

 

“Well,” she answered, opening the door, “It’s the lost children’s ward.”

 

A chill ran over Edward’s spine, and he pushed past Oswald and Lee. He let out a choked gasp as he saw the faces that turned to look at him. Most of them were unfamiliar, children that meant nothing to him, but the three in the corner…

 

“The Riddler!” the girl burst out, jumping to her feet, “Are you here to ask us a riddle?”

 

“Is your name Sarah?” he breathed out.

 

She frowned, and for a moment his heart stopped. It was her, it _had_ to be her.

 

“That’s not a very good riddle,” she said, “But yes.”

 

“Oh my god,” he sank to the floor, burying his face in his hands, “Alexander? Nicholas?”

 

The boys nodded, approaching cautiously.

 

“Do you know these kids, Ed?” Lee asked, perplexed. Behind her, Oswald was watching on in equally confused wonder.

 

Edward paused, “That’s… a very difficult question to answer. But if you had the ability to check, I believe you would find that I am their father.”

 

It was good that both Oswald and Lee were strong personalities, for that revelation would have made anyone of a weaker constitution faint on the spot. As it was, they rather looked like a feather would be enough to knock them both over.

 

As for the children, Sarah was looking at him in awe and the boys with curiosity.

 

“You have _children?_ ” the flabbergasted adults asked in unison.

 

“It’s a long story,” Edward said, “Perhaps someday I’ll tell you both. Let’s just say that sometimes when you cry into the void, the void gives some pretty good advice back. But for now, I would like to know what I need to do to get legal custody of my children.”

 

Lee took a moment before she faintly replied, “I’ll look into it. I suppose in this climate you’ll provide them just as good a home as anyone. But once we finally achieve reunification, I _will_ be investigating this further.”

 

“Fine,” Edward said, “But they are my children, and you won’t take them from me. I’m not going to lose them, not ever again.”

 

He glanced over at Oswald, nervous that this new development would cost them the shaky relationship they had finally begun, “I hope this doesn’t change things…?”

 

Oswald took a deep breath, “I mean, I’m sure it will…”

 

Edward bit his lip.

 

“I suppose,” Oswald said slowly, “That it would be good for Martin to have some siblings.”

 

Edward felt tears falling down his face, but for once, they weren’t out of misery. They weren’t out of despair that he was destined for nothing but pain. No, these tears were out of joy, the joy that he had at last found a family that he loved with all his heart, and the joy that they loved him just as much in return.

**Author's Note:**

> I thought I would look up DC characters with reality bending powers to give a name to the voice, but in the end I didn't have the time so we're gonna say it's my self-insert OC. 
> 
> Also, Sarah Marie is named after Sarah Essen and Marie Curie, Nicholas is named after Nikola Tesla, and Alexander is named after Alexander Gettler. 
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed this, and if you did, comments are always appreciated!


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